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Paul Johnson's comedy blog: I didn't get into comedy to be rich or famous. All I've ever wanted was to be loved…by somebody rich and famous.
Browsing All posts tagged under »comedy«
The Fonz is All Ears…Unless You’re Calling His Name
As a child I remember being reprimanded a lot for not listening, as though turning off my ears had been a conscious decision. Adults swore they had told me something important, and I had nodded acknowledgement, but all details of the conversation eluded me. I remember a lot of conversations ending with, “Do you understand […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Smell Ya Later. Or Not, Because I Have No Sense of Smell.
October 12, 2011
(The Good Greatsby would appreciate any Halloween related questions concerning the ghost haunting your garbage disposal, the ghoul in your office microwave, or the skeletons in your closet. Submit a question in 100 words or less on the Dear Good Greatsby page.) Today’s question comes from Joe Knight who seeks an explanation for his lack […]
Smack Talk 101: Can I get you a bowl of smackaroni and cheese?
October 11, 2011
Smack talk is not my strong suit. Some people think half the fun of a fantasy football league is sending taunting emails and texts to other players, but I’ve never liked mean humor and I have a hard time getting into the spirit of being one of the guys while worrying about crossing the line. […]
The Search Engine Oracle Speaks, Clears Throat, Reiterates
October 10, 2011
Some seemingly innocent search terms keep me up late at night: guess how much i love you At first, I assumed this was a random search, but I found it more satisfying to convince myself I had a secret admirer. Secret admirer, guessing how much I love you is pretty hard without knowing who you […]
Eye on Chinglish
October 9, 2011
This picture comes from the back of an eyelash thickener: Maybe I just never paid attention to eyelash thickener products when I was in America, but is there really an American eyelash limit? If so, it seems the government should have better things to do than set limits on the freedom of our eyelashes. This […]
Saturday Brain Biscuits & Gravy
October 8, 2011
My seven-year-old son, The Fonz, is very interested in zombies right now, and when he overheard me mention I had watched an episode of the AMC zombie show, The Walking Dead, he started asking if he could watch it despite my warnings it was much too scary. I finally let him watch an advertisement for […]
Ruminations Over Underdogs Over Overdogs
October 7, 2011
Every year during the baseball playoffs, my son and I debate what we enjoy more: 1. Cheering for our favorite team to win; or 2. Cheering for the New York Yankees to lose. The Germans have a word, shadenfreude, which means taking delight in the misfortunes of others. Many philosophers consider feelings of shadenfreude to […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Does My Pet Dove Poop on My Computer Because She Hates My Writing?
October 5, 2011
Today’s question comes from Spectra of spectrumwoman.com, who wonders whether her pet dove is expressing distaste for her writing by pooping on her computer. Because the question regards pets, my cat, Megatron, has volunteered to be a guest panelist. When I say she volunteered, I mean I’ll chase her back and forth across my keyboard. […]
Scenes from the Shanghai Zoo
October 4, 2011
Today is a holiday for most people in China, and here are some things observed among the swarms of visitors at the Shanghai Zoo that you might find different than your local zoo: Chinese people take more pictures of the white foreigners than they do the animals, yet foreigners receive no zoo entry discount. The […]
Chinglish Smart Size
October 2, 2011
I took both pictures of these contraceptives at a shop on my street here in Shanghai: Come on, guys, no matter how confident you are, do you really want to use a condom with the name brand ‘retard’? It’s a tough choice if I have to decide between the ‘large size’ and the ‘smart size’. […]
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The Good Greatsby 
October 13, 2011
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