
My seven-year-old son, The Fonz, is very interested in zombies right now, and when he overheard me mention I had watched an episode of the AMC zombie show, The Walking Dead, he started asking if he could watch it despite my warnings it was much too scary. I finally let him watch an advertisement for the show so he would understand the show wasn’t for kids. He agreed it might be too scary, but a part of him still wanted to watch. He said, “Seventy-five percent of me thinks it’s a good idea and twenty-five percent thinks it’s a bad idea.” I recommended he listen to the twenty-five percent, and he cupped a hand to his ear and replied, “I don’t hear anything.”
I worry about The Fonz if he only has twenty-five percent of his conscience telling him to make the smart decision at the same time he suffers from poor hearing.
…..
Weekly Tip: I’ve always been a big goal setter and start each day by reviewing a set of goals for the year, month, week, and day. Just in case someone is ever snooping around and reads my to-do list, I always add one joke:
October 8–To Do
Write post
Play catch with kids
Pay bills
Revenge
Exercise
Clean attic
Not only is this fun, but it also serves as a warning to nosy people who might be tempted to give you trouble that you’re the type who seeks revenge.
…..
Only one day left to vote in the caption contest. The competition and bad blood have grown more competitive and bad bloodier than ever, especially between She’s a Maineiac and pegoleg who both wrote hilarious posts shamelessly begging for votes:
She’s a Maineiac: Mr. Skittles Needs Your Help
pegoleg: Always A (Caption Contest) Bridesmaid, Never a Bride
…..
I’ve been working on multiple writing projects the last couple months and have tried to be very disciplined about how many hours I write each day. At dinner this week, I explained to my family how excited I was at how much I’ve been able to write, but apologized for being a zombie in conversation with them because I was having a hard time switching gears when I finished writing. Optimist Prime said, “Sounds like you need a little time to decompose in the evenings.”
I asked if he had meant to say ‘decompress’ and he said yes, but I still felt threatened after all this recent talk of zombies. I want no part of decompressing in the evenings if takes me anywhere close to decomposing.
…..
Here’s a picture of my son on his skateboard:
Can your kid do this?
Neither can mine. He and his friend spent the day staging pictures that would make them look like much better skaters than they really were. I’m so proud of him; scheming to trick people into being impressed with you is almost as impressive as actually being impressive.
theblondemonstersblog
October 8, 2011
Love it!! …and you should be so proud to have kids scheming to impress-much better than those scheming to depress!!!
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
When you put it like that I feel even prouder.
georgettesullins
October 8, 2011
So is scheming part of the 25% or the 75%?
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
The scheming in this instance came from my older son whose conscience is more favorably balanced at seventy-five percent telling him to do the right thing.
m
October 8, 2011
Actually, decompose is the perfect word. You have been writing (i.e. composing) and now you are trying to de-compose. Brillianance, right there at your own dinner table.
optimist prime
October 8, 2011
Hey! a few select ones were real!
educlaytion
October 8, 2011
As a zombie expert I can tell you that Walking Dead is indeed no place to start for a 14 year old. I mean, he won’t even understand the intricacies of zombie metaphor nor the evolution of zombie cognitive abilities through the George Romero catalog. Thanks for the good start to Saturday morning.
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
As a zombie expert, can you recommend any zombie shows that might be more appropriate for a seven-year-old as his introduction to zombies?
John Erickson
October 9, 2011
I can’t recommend a show, but I’d be glad to run the boy through a “Field Ops 101” to show him how to find good cover and/or concealment, what houses to use as fortresses, how to load and fire any type of firearm including black powder, the basics of vehicular armouring, and basic booby-traps. All I ask for recompense is 100 rounds of .303 caliber ammunition – I gotta have a LITTLE fun! 😀
gojulesgo
October 8, 2011
Your last sentence reminds me of one my favorite scenes in Clueless, the best movie of all-time. (I’ll stand by that until my dying day. And yes, I may have ‘inadvertently’ memorized every line.)
Father: Cher, do you mean to tell me you argued you way from a C+ to an A-?
Cher: Yes, Daddy. Simply based on my powers of persuasion. You proud?
Father: Honey, I couldn’t be more proud than if they were based on actual grades.
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
I heartily agree. Lots of kids are smart enough to get good grades, but very few are smart enough to avoid doing all the work required because they know they can argue their way to better grades on the last day of the semester.
k8edid
October 8, 2011
I like your to-do list. I usually put a joke on mine, as well. Usually, that is the “exercise” entry as I do plan some sort of revenge each day. Why leave it to chance?
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
I always try and kill two birds with one stone by finding a way to combine exercise with revenge.
Louise
October 8, 2011
I love Walking Dead and all things zombies! Your son sounds super cool! I would be proud of him too!
Cheers,
Louise
gerknoop
October 9, 2011
I also take a lot of time to make my pictures look much more impressive to people than they really are! My BFF and I have an agreement that no pics are posted that are not completey favorable and put us in the best light. So I am impressed by you son OP….plus I looked to see if he had a blog as well when I saw his comment!
John Erickson
October 9, 2011
“Revenge” was your joke entry? Rats – I picked “pay bills”.
And actually, I did do something similar to the photograph, but I did actually do the trick. Most of it, anyway. And my left leg came away intact. Most of it, anyway…..
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
‘Pay bills’ is often an essential component of ‘revenge’ because when you try and hire people to help you with the revenge and promise them a bunch of money, it’s very common for them to check your credit.
thelifeofjamie
October 9, 2011
at least he recognizes the 25%…
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
I guess it could have been worse if he’d said one hundred percent was telling him to do the wrong thing.
limr
October 9, 2011
I am sooo glad to hear that someone else is as concerned about zombies as I am. I already have shooting lessons arranged so I will never miss the head shot. The Fonz will be a valuable ally.
The Good Greatsby
October 9, 2011
Just because there’s no evidence zombies exist doesn’t mean we shouldn’t panic as much as possible.
monicastangledweb
October 9, 2011
Looks like the Fonz is growing up to be just like his dad. Congratulations, you’ve raised a mini you, which is what 75% of parents want. 😉
JM Randolph
October 9, 2011
“I don’t hear anything”. Brilliant. I assume he’s hip to the app game Plants vs. Zombies? The only movie that comes to mind that might not be completely scary at that age is maybe Shaun of the Dead, though it’s probably inappropriate for other reasons. Reasons that 25% of me is probably screaming out right now, but I don’t hear anything.
pegoleg
October 10, 2011
I’d like to know how your son staged that photo. He may have a future in the film industry.
And I resent the remark that the caption contest showed bad blood. That was good bloodier!
She's a Maineiac
October 10, 2011
What on earth is he referring to, Peg? Isn’t that how we always communicate? Thinly veiled insults and outright contempt?
HoaiPhai
October 10, 2011
Excellent fake fakie photo!
flippingchannels
October 10, 2011
It’s a good thing you took the time to clarify your list. I thought “clean attic” was the joke.
pattisj
October 11, 2011
OP & the Fonz sound like pretty smart kids. I’d watch my back if I were you. Now–to the revenge, um, I mean EXERCISE.
savesprinkles1234
October 12, 2011
I’m extremely impressed by both of your sons, but not fake impressed; really, real impressed! You’ve taught them the skills to go far in life!