
My ten-year-old son, Optimist Prime, invited a few friends for a sleepover last night. When the doorbell rang, he asked if I would get it and when I returned with his friend, OP was reclining on the couch reading War and Peace.
I was so proud all the lessons I had taught him about how to impress people had not fallen on deaf ears. I can’t decide whether I’d be more proud of him if he were actually reading War and Peace instead of just pretending to read War and Peace.
…..
Today was a sad day for my oldest son as his best friend of four years left China and returned to Italy. When I woke up this morning everybody was crying. Optimist Prime was crying because his friend had just left on an early flight. The Fonz was also crying; I assume his tears came because this boy’s parents let him play video games a lot more than we let our kids play, and now The Fonz didn’t know where he was going to get his video game fix. My wife was crying because she felt bad for both the boys or because the pancakes she was making didn’t quite turn out. I entered the scene still wearing the Star Wars t-shirt I slept in, and after I gave OP a long hug, I realized his face was pressed up against Darth Vader’s, and I told him, “Years from now when you look back on this moment, remember it was Darth Vader who comforted you.” This made him feel better and he’ll look at the Stars Wars movies in a whole new light.
…..
You still have one more day to submit a caption in the caption contest.
Here’s an interesting fact: not one of the previous caption contest winners was attacked by killers bees this summer. Does winning the caption contest guarantee you immunity from killer bees? The evidence isn’t yet conclusive, but yes, yes it does.
…..
My sons were talking about how OP was the most popular kid on the bus, and The Fonz took exception and tauntingly explained, “The only reason you’re the most popular kid is because you make everybody laugh.” I had to explain to him that this was an explanation for popularity, not a disqualification. He seemed really surprised that popularity might not be entirely out of his control.
Annie
September 17, 2011
Love it, as always.
The part about the Darth Vader hug was the best.
Have a great weekend! I’m heading out to freeze my “stuff” off at my kids soccer games. Who signed the kids up for this early Saturday morning crap anyway? 😉
georgettesullins
September 17, 2011
Thank you for the scoop. The warm hug you gave OP made my gelato melt…but I ate (read) fast. No worries.
thelifeofjamie
September 17, 2011
What a sweet story…hope OP feels better soon!
gerknoop
September 17, 2011
If I had gotta a hug from my Dad with that “Darth Vader” line, I am pretty sure I would have never forgotten it!
Also, I love the pretending to read War and Peace….he sounds like a chip off the old block!
k8edid
September 17, 2011
I feel for OP, a friend moving away is a sad thing. Nice touch with the Darth Vader hug. Sounds like a tear-jerker morning – hope the rest of the weekend is happier.
limr
September 17, 2011
That reminds me. I am still only halfway through War and Peace. I’d better get cracking if I want to finish that sucker before Christmas. Though it is certainly good exercise lugging that thing around to read in public so I can impress more people than if I wait for someone to come over.
Byron MacLymont
September 17, 2011
Context is everything, though – the “try to make everyone on the bus laugh to get popular” translates surprisingly poorly to adulthood. “Make everyone on the schoolbus laugh” doubly so.
pegoleg
September 17, 2011
Where’s the gelato? I didn’t see any gelato. Seems like you’ve got a bait and switch going on here, luring people in with a promise of gelato.
Laura
September 17, 2011
You didn’t get any? That’s really a shame; it was delicious.
pegoleg
September 17, 2011
One of those limited time offer deals, hmm? Dang!
granny1947
September 17, 2011
I like the sound of your son…think we could relate!
Kim Pugliano
September 18, 2011
Sometimes my husband wears a Bradley Cooper t-shirt just so I can tell people Bradley Cooper hugged me.
John Erickson
September 18, 2011
Was it a female friend that you showed in? I seem to remember that, when attempting to impress 10-year-old boys, the LESS cerebral the attempt, the better. And definitely NOT books, unless the books educated one in farting or armpit noises.
Or was that my last job? I mix ’em up sometimes……
Good work on the hug – even Darth needs a little love!
spilledinkguy
September 18, 2011
I’m still waiting for an audio version of War and Peace.
As read by James Earl Jones.
‘Chapter one… *whooo paaaah*…’
HoaiPhai
September 18, 2011
I pretend to read The Good Greatsby blog to impress people but they still won’t let me go over and play video games with them. What am I doing wrong?
madtante
September 18, 2011
Brave man who walks into a roomful of crying people–worse, family. I’d probably have left/ hid/ leapt out a window.
Sara no "H"
September 19, 2011
Ha ha that’s awesome. Your kids sound awesome! Sorry about their little friend moving away. It is always tough on them.
Seasweetie
September 19, 2011
You’re a good dad, Greatsby!
thoughtsappear
September 19, 2011
Poor lil’ guys…at least they’ll always have Vader.
mistyslaws
September 19, 2011
So, was the friend duly impressed that your son was reading War & Peace, or did he immediately think that your son was a pretentious poser? I need the answer to this question so I know whether to impliment this strategy in the future. I have 2 young boys. I get all my parenting advice from other bloggers. That is why I am awesome.
pattisj
September 20, 2011
I missed out on the gelato, too. Nice Vader touch, there. You’re a hero. Sorry OP’s missing his friend.
trishdar
September 20, 2011
wait………so i can still be popular??
gabriella
September 29, 2011
this is hilarious.