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Paul Johnson's comedy blog: I didn't get into comedy to be rich or famous. All I've ever wanted was to be loved…by somebody rich and famous.
Browsing All posts tagged under »advice«
Dear Good Greatsby Reveals His Fake-itude
And today’s question comes from The Daily Retort‘s Tor Constantino, who seems to be skeptical of the authenticity of The Good Greatsby’s glasses. Dear G2, Are those prescription glasses you wear in your photos or are they simply the fakey fashion kind to make you look smarter – know what I mean? Some people dress […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Help! I’m a Zombie Trying to Kick My Brains Addiction!
October 19, 2011
The first question comes from Binky of Wombania Comics who appears to be suffering an existential crisis. Dear Good Greatsby, I might be a pumpkin. What should I do? And don’t say make pie! Binky Dear Binky, Paul: During the Halloween season, psychiatrists always report an uptick in patients claiming to be pumpkins. These patients […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Smell Ya Later. Or Not, Because I Have No Sense of Smell.
October 12, 2011
(The Good Greatsby would appreciate any Halloween related questions concerning the ghost haunting your garbage disposal, the ghoul in your office microwave, or the skeletons in your closet. Submit a question in 100 words or less on the Dear Good Greatsby page.) Today’s question comes from Joe Knight who seeks an explanation for his lack […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Does My Pet Dove Poop on My Computer Because She Hates My Writing?
October 5, 2011
Today’s question comes from Spectra of spectrumwoman.com, who wonders whether her pet dove is expressing distaste for her writing by pooping on her computer. Because the question regards pets, my cat, Megatron, has volunteered to be a guest panelist. When I say she volunteered, I mean I’ll chase her back and forth across my keyboard. […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Help! I Was Born With a Siamese Nostril!
September 28, 2011
Today’s question comes from HoaiPhai, who sent me a question during pollen season regarding pollen season. Although pollen season has probably passed (I can’t say for sure because I can’t find pollen season on any official calendar and until I experience hay fever I have to say it certainly sounds like an old wives’ tale), […]
Dear Good Greatsby: How Do I Get My Husband to Realize I’m Perfect?
September 21, 2011
Today’s question comes from gojulesgo of goguiltypleasures.com, who worries her marriage is becoming too equal for her liking. (If gojulesgo sounds familiar, perhaps you’ve heard from your friends Jules has her very own barn.) Dear Good Greatsby, Over the past 8 years, my husband has grown quite spoiled by my wit, generosity and what some […]
Motivate Yourself with High-Risk Deadlines
September 19, 2011
I have no problem motivating myself to write every day, but I have the bad habit of skipping around between projects when I meet a difficult section and have no pressing deadline. This is why I’m constantly thinking up tricks to give myself artificial deadlines for finishing projects. For example, right now I’m motivating myself […]
Dear Good Greatsby: How Can I Tell If My Neighbor is Dead?
September 14, 2011
Today’s questions comes from Laura of Unlikely Explanations who wonders what is the politest way to determine if her neighbor is dead. Dear Good Greatsby, This question is about my neighbors. I’ll call them Betty and Don, because those names are similar enough to Beth and Dan that I think I’ll be able to get […]
Dear Good Greatsby: Are You Secretly in Love with Me?
September 7, 2011
After numerous last minute cancellations, it falls to my assistant Ken to serve as a guest panelist and help answer the question of Kim Pugliano who seeks advice in sorting a sordid love triangle–one that a licensed therapist might call imaginary but one which this unlicensed therapist takes very seriously. Dear Good Greatsby~ How do […]
Dear Good Greatsby: How Do I Convince Someone to Give Me a House?
August 31, 2011
Today is my birthday and my mom has agreed to be a guest panelist and refrain from trying to make me feel guilty as her gift to me. The first question comes from Jim Chaney at The Wordslinger. Please check out his blog and click on all his links. You might start with his hilarious post My […]
Dear Good Greatsby: How Do I Convince My Sister to Do Me More Favors?
August 24, 2011
Today’s guest panelist will be my best friend, Todd, who finds himself with a bit of time on his hands since I accidentally got him fired from his last three jobs. The first question comes from The Average Person at the blog theaveragelives.wordpress.com. Dear Good Greatsby, Recently I’m becoming increasingly worried due to my sister seemingly […]
Dear Good Greatsby: How Do I Convince My Children I’m Smarter Than They Are?
August 17, 2011
Today’s guest panelist will be my time-wasting robot, Philo T-2000, who has been watching reruns of Oprah to enable him to understand human emotions and give applicable advice. The first question comes from Jamie of The Life of Jamie. Allow me to recommend Jamie by saying she’s displayed excellent taste by disliking all the same […]
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November 2, 2011
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