I’m fond of reminding my sons that “adults rule and kids drool.” This is a catchy way to constantly reinforce the value of my judgment over theirs.
Kids have a short attention span and it’s important to use rhymes and catchy sayings to help them quickly remember good advice and make the right decisions.
Whitney Houston once said, “Crack is whack.” I like to remind my kids to stay away from crack by repeating her catchy counsel when they get on the bus each morning:
“Have a great day. Make lots of friends. Remember Whitney Houston says ‘crack is whack.'”
They’ll always remember this saying, although I’m not sure how useful it is because they’ve asked me to explain crack and I’m not sure what it is, although I’m fairly certain it’s whack. Also, they’ve asked me to explain Whitney Houston.
I also like to repeat the verse from the Old Testament, “Beer before liquor, never sicker.” It seems to have worked so far as neither of my sons have ever experienced any alcohol-related illness.
I’ve decided to develop my own catchy rhymes to constantly remind my kids to make the right decisions and stay on the straight-and-narrow. I try and repeat each of these once each day.
Don’t blow off a lady when you learn she has a mister; relax, play it cool, she might have a sister.
Check under the bed before you count sheep, you never know where monsters may creep.
Vampire peer pressure:
Sucking blood makes you a dud.
No man is a fox wearing black shoes with white socks.
Zombie peer pressure:
Those who eat brains experience bowel movement pains.
One of your mother’s greatest joys, comes from trashing not-put-away toys.
If on your iPod I find a Nickelback song, I’ll consider myself a failed parent and wonder where I went wrong.
If you appear on a reality show, don’t tell your parents, we’d rather not know.