Saturday Side Salad

Posted on November 19, 2011


My favorite search term this week:

justin bieber takes fraternety test

I think the searcher meant paternity test because Bieber is only sixteen years old and won’t need to worry about joining a college fraternity for a couple more years.  He definitely should put fraternity considerations on a back burner until he sorts out this paternity business.


My ten-year-old son, Optimist Prime, is always starting new businesses.  You may not have heard of any of these businesses because they usually close after a day or two or sometimes after a minute or two.  I found a contract he and a friend had signed outlining terms for a new business they were starting for a magazine called Sports with Illustrations.  The idea for this business came only a couple days after I bought him a Sports Illustrated magazine.  Hmm…I wonder where he got the idea for the name.


Optimist Prime is a pretty smart kid.  He’s only ten years old and read the new 560-page Steve Jobs biography this past week.  That was the intellectual high point of the week.  The low point was when the song SexyBack by Justin Timberlake was playing and he told me he didn’t like it, and I told him I had a soft spot for the song because it made me think of America ever since President Obama played the song at his inauguration.  And Optimist Prime believed me.  It’s pretty hard to fool him anymore and because I consider teasing the kids one of my most important parental responsibilities, knowing I had successfully tricked him became one of the high points of my week.


Turkey trot on over and vote in the caption contest.


If hotcakes really sell like hotcakes, why isn’t there a single hotcake company listed on the Fortune 500?

Posted in: Columns