
Perhaps you’ve heard the slang term “hateorade” as in “Don’t be sippin’ on the hateorade!” This is a term most often employed after a logical, fair argument has been presented, and the recipient of the criticism has no logic or facts to toss back and uses hateorade to hint at jealousy being the root of the criticism, “Keep sippin’ the hateorade, hater.” (I think hateorade has something to do with green Gatorade and green being the color of jealousy, but scholars are still debating its true origins.) The crowd witnessing the argument will forget all the logic and possibly well-meaning criticism in the first comment and will be overcome by the catchy accusation of being a hater, resulting in a collective, “Awww, snap!”
“Quit drinkin’ the hateorade!” is a handy weapon for your rejoinder holster, especially if you’re the type who is wildly untalented, but won’t accept even the mildest reality check. You never have to be right. You don’t have to answer any specific criticism. All you have to do is accuse them of hating and you win.
“Honey, your father and I don’t think you should try out for American Idol. You’re not a good singer, and you’re not a good dancer.”
“Whatever, haters…guess you been drinkin’ the hateorade.”
“Your father and I aren’t haters. We’re telling you the truth because we care. Most parents encourage their children’s terrible singing, but we care enough to tell you the truth before you’re on television.”
“Keep sippin’. Keep sippin’ that hateorade, haters.”
If you’re the type who is seldom right, your “Awww, snap!” gallery may tire of hateorade quickly, and you may want to consider one of these 2.0 versions of being a hater:
“Why would you buy this house?”
“I got a great deal.”
“But the house is on fire.”
“Whatever. I guess you’ve been lickin’ the despise cream.”
“Your backgrounds are so different. Honey, I don’t think he’s right for you.”
“Why, because he’s not white?”
“No, because he’s a hologram.”
“Whatever, keep sippin’ the genocider.”
“The school called and said you’ve been missing a lot of class.”
“Crunch, crunch! How are those Cool Ranch Cold Shoulder-itos?”
“When are you going to pay your half of the rent?”
“Did you hear about the 2-for-1 pancake special down at the Evil Eye-HOP?”
“I think you’re sitting in my seat.”
“I don’t see your name on it.”
“But my name is on the title. This is my car. The title is in the glove compartment.”
“Guess who has the inside track and just took the lead in the abhor-se race.”
“Your book report is due today.”
“Says who?”
“Says me, your teacher.”
“Have you seen that new show Lord of the Intolerdance?”
“Do you have that $10 you owe me?”
“And my friend will have three croissants, four sesame rolls, and a loathe of bread.”
“Ouch! You just ran over my foot!”
“Judge, allow me to call my next witness. Please place your hand on this Bible and swear your detest-imony will be the truth…”
“Hey, that’s my husband you’re kissing!”
“If you’re gonna make me a sandwich, will you please cut off the crust-ies?”
If you’re unfamiliar with the urban slang word “hateorade” perhaps you spend your time more wisely than I do. Or maybe you’re just a hater–quit drinkin’ the hateorade, hater!
ryoko861
May 31, 2011
In my neck of the woods, we just say “Don’t be hatin'”. Or “How much crack have you been smokin’?”
Never heard “Keep on Drinkin’ the Hateorade”.
Am I missing something here?
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Maybe you’ve only been hanging out with people who are genuinely always right.
bridgesburning
May 31, 2011
Now that is a 100% new bit of info for me and still trying to het my head around some of them!! 🙂
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Don’t let the current generation of kids have all the fun in being wrong.
Tori Nelson
May 31, 2011
I just tried this on my son. He can’t talk, but I saw an immediate decrease in his Sassy Eye Glares. You are brilliant!
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Don’t let him give you the Evil Eye-HOP.
cooper
May 31, 2011
additional slang of the same ilk;
dateorade for people inept at dating
fateorade used exclusively by psychics
mateorate to be used within 36 hours of attempted conception
nateorade for guys named Nate
and on and on…
Sidney
May 31, 2011
I hate tardiness. Lateorade.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
All excellent suggestions. Tomorrow I’ll try and meet a Nate so I can use nateorade on him.
MommyLisa
May 31, 2011
My fave was the Cold Shouder-itos.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I bet you can’t just have one.
thelifeofjamie
May 31, 2011
I like toe cold shoulderitos…that’s a good one. I hate when people say hater or haterade. It makes me feel a million years old and like I am in a bad MTV video. (and I’m only 32)
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I would say I hate people who say hater, but those people would call me a hater in response.
Spectra
May 31, 2011
Well, you loyal fans best start sipping some Voterade, and vote for The Good Greatsby’s nominated piece, (about Osama bin Laden, the Royal Wedding, Vin Diesel, or something) that he might be considered for a Fat Jerry Award.
Vote here: http://spectrumwoman.com
There is a write in column, and I have been voting for my own pieces all morning, even before publishing my post, because nobody nominated me for anything. So, there is a good chance, no matter how many votes you cast Paul’s way, I am still going to manipulate the results to make myself win. A good chance.
Very good.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I didn’t know we could nominate you. Please don’t be mad and try and give me the Cold Shoulder-ito.
Invisible Mikey
May 31, 2011
I loved all your terms, though I’m hopelessly out-of-date. When patients object to an uncomfortable position I must put them in on the table I point to my film badge, but they don’t seem to know “Talk to the dosimeter”. On the other hand, as he left one kid called back, “See ya later, Radiator”. I attempted to explain I had a 2-yr. degree which makes me a Radiationologist, but it was too late.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
“See ya later, Radiator” is way more fun to say than “See ya later, Radiationologist.” Have you considered changing your job title?
Lenore Diane
May 31, 2011
Evil Eye-Hop, Loathe of breade … You’re funny. You are funny.
Lenore Diane
June 1, 2011
Loathe of bread. Bread. Not breade. Ding dangity. Don’t be hatin’.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I assumed you had written it that way on purpose. Kids today are always misspelling their slang words on purpose, so I thought “loathe of breade” sounded perfectly satirical.
Renee Davies
May 31, 2011
This is so good…I want a rejoinder holster. Does it come in Italian leather?
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Yes, but I’m not sure about the color so don’t try and buy matching shoes just yet.
gmomj
May 31, 2011
Punny very very punny.
“Yo Vitriol, Dude, read this gangsta’s blog man. He been lifting at da ill will store man.
That’s Balmorese. Your welcome. 🙂
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I like “lifting at da ill will store”. I’ll try and get somebody mad at me today so I can give this one a try.
limr
May 31, 2011
I may have to start giving my students extra credit for teaching me all the new lingo. I know all about mad skillz, being deaded, and hatin’ on haters like a boss. But hateorade went right under my radar. Damn!
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Don’t be embarrassed–I hadn’t heard of “being deaded” until you mentioned it.
limr
June 1, 2011
(Don’t know if you’ve seen it or are interested, but all you wanted to know – or really, all i wanted to say – about ‘deaded’ is here: )
http://asalinguist.wordpress.com/2011/04/08/oh-snap/
madtante
May 31, 2011
For whatever reason, “evil eye HOP” made me snort (and I’m sitting at work). Possibly because I like to give the stink-eye…
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
I hope somebody will give you the “evil eye-HOP” line in response and you’ll think of me.
Renée A. Schuls-Jacobson
June 1, 2011
As a teacher of Gen Y’ers, it is really important that I am always hip and have the 411 on what’s new and what’s now. You know, the down-low. So thanks for the lesson. I think I will transcribe this in longhand and mimeograph it for all the cool-cats to read in the fall. You know, when they return to the classroom, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
I hope they don’t spend their summers smoking dope.
Ooops, I think I just sipped some of that Hateorade. 😉
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
They should be impressed if they hear you use any of these new terms, and if they’re not impressed, of course you should accuse them of being haters.
blackwatertown
June 1, 2011
I might have to offer a sip of my delicious and refreshing fruit punch in the mouth.
But that may be because I’m running on cont-empty.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Well done. I’ll add “cont-empty” to my rejoinder holster.
Olivia K
June 1, 2011
I will forward this to my husband. The youth pastor. Who is always trying to be cool by using words like “Epic.” I love to watch the kids roll their eyes at him.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Tell your husband not to be discouraged by those eye-rolling haters.
spilledinkguy
June 1, 2011
*glug glug glug*
Oooohhhh! Delightfully lemon-limeie…
🙂
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Quit sippin’!
nancyfrancis
June 1, 2011
I find that with the popularity of “Don’t Judge Me” these days, just muttering ‘Judge-ing” under your breath gets the job done.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
And if someone tells you not to judge, aren’t they making an assumption that you are the type of person who judges, and isn’t that a judgement?
nancyfrancis
June 1, 2011
Vicious circle, it is!
Amy
June 1, 2011
I’ve always been a fan of Spite-amin Water, myself.
“Cool Ranch Cold Shoulder-itos” – Yes!!
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Cool Ranch Cold Shoulder-itos always make me thirsty for Spite-amin water.
educlaytion
June 1, 2011
Despise cream and genocider had me cracking up!
writerdood
June 1, 2011
It’s a perfect combo for the chewing gum thing. “It’s time to chew gum and drink hateraide, and I’m all out of gum!” Or you could do the bag thing, but use a liter size. “I got fifteen liters of hateraide in a one liter container.”
Jeane
June 1, 2011
Brilliant…I might be inclined to use despise cream way too often.
Penny
June 1, 2011
I have never heard of this !! Keep sippin’ that hateorade, haters.” it’s always been gatorade where I live _ Are you positive you’re not an alien? and your really out there wondering around on one of those unknow galaxies ! flying around in space somewhere ?? trying to grasp a touch of the real world?
See you later gator-ade !! 🙂
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
If you’ve never heard of this, maybe you were too busy wasting your time reading a book.
Penny
June 2, 2011
or other things !!
Mark Kaplowitz
June 1, 2011
If alligators were low on electrolytes from playing ultimate Frisbee, you could say, “Keep sippin’ that Gatorade, ‘gators.”
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Very clever. I hope that cleverness isn’t lost on the gators. Gators are a notoriously difficult crowd for comedy.
Jess Witkins
June 1, 2011
I kind of want to know how long it took you to come up with all these. However long, they are amazing! Evil-Eye Hop, Genocider, and hateorade are all fabulous. Thank you for teaching me these phrases. LOL
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
I hope these phrases can provide a lifetime of winning arguments you have no business winning.
Binky
June 1, 2011
Are you a terror-teetotaler?
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
How did “terror” slip my mind as an option?
Kim
June 1, 2011
What if one prefers Powerade over Gaterade?
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Glowerade?
youngamericanwisdom.com
June 1, 2011
Sadly, they were trashing the almighty Gatorade on TV today. Something silly about heart disease and obesity. They should seriously give you a call about how they can go about redeeming their reputation. Fantastic!
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Heart disease and obesity are a small price to pay for rapid electrolyte replacement.
georgette sullins
June 1, 2011
How do you come up with this stuff? LOL…you’re contagious!!!
To the cab driver in NY: How much for de-ride to the Stage Delicatessen?
When did he break up with her?
De-nied he found out she was cheatin’.
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Those cab drivers deserve to be de-rided.
Thomas Stazyk
June 1, 2011
Well said.
lifeintheboomerlane
June 1, 2011
I’ve never heard the Hatorade thing. Clearly, I’m hanging out with the wrong element. But, hey, I just heard a really catchy new phrase: “That sucks!” I love it. I’m going to get rid of my current “Gosh darnnit!” and start using it.
The Good Greatsby
June 1, 2011
Don’t let anyone tell you “That sucks!” has been around for decades.
Lunar Euphoria
June 1, 2011
Someone’s been drinkin’ the fool-aid.
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Still drinking the fool-aid despite all my warnings about excess sugar being bad for you.
Paige Kellerman
June 1, 2011
I had a boyfriend who liked to use the term “hateorade” quite often…
When it came down to choosing a husband, his “hateorade” usage took him out of the running. It’s a serious offense, in my book. I much prefer Husband’s usage of “Aww..snap”…but then, I’m a purist.
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
You can’t marry someone who will accuse you of drinking hateorade every time you ask if he forgot to pick up the kids again.
girlonthecontrary
June 2, 2011
I much prefer the “Yo mama!” and “You are!” response. For example…
Sister: Um, you’re driving on the wrong side of the rode.
Me: Yo mama driving on the wrong side of the road!
Sister: Your mama too…..
Me: You’re my mama too.
Sister: What?
Me: In your face sucka! What what!
The Good Greatsby
June 2, 2011
Those classics will never go out of style.
the master
June 6, 2011
Well, this was certainly eye-opening. I just assumed “don’t be sippin’ the Hateorade” was well-meaning advice, like “don’t drink the Kool-Aid” (can’t believe no-one else made a Kool-Aid reference. Either every else thought that was too obvious, or everyone else is much less disturbed than me).
And in a bid to bring this site up to Goodwin coded, may I suggest “Looks like someone’s been taking their Hitler-seltzer!”
writerwoman61
June 7, 2011
It’s too bad that phrase wasn’t around when I was a kid…I wasn’t even allowed to call my brother “stupid.”
Just getting caught up on blog-reading…I’m way behind…
Wendy