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Paul Johnson's comedy blog: I didn't get into comedy to be rich or famous. All I've ever wanted was to be loved…by somebody rich and famous.
Browsing All posts tagged under »humor«
How to Tease Your Kids
My wife said I can’t tease the kids anymore. I use the word anymore as though it used to be okay to tease and now it isn’t, but in reality she’s always said not to, only now I think she really means it. It seems the kids were having trouble in school for a long […]
BREAKING NEWS!!!: Charlie Sheen, Mark Cuban talk about ‘things’
March 7, 2011
Mark Cuban, owner of the NBA’s Dallas Mavericks, is in talks with Charlie Sheen on a potential new show for his network HDNet. Mark Cuban gave no hints as to the show’s premise, but might Cuban be giving us a clue through his riveting use of the word ‘things’?
Big government versus limited government
March 6, 2011
I’ve heard some very persuasive arguments against big government. But I’ve also heard great counter-arguments touting the government’s ability to regulate more efficiently and with more transparency than private enterprise. But can’t all political parties come together to find common ground and agree that some branch of government must get involved and stop Vin Diesel […]
You will have fun on your vacation…or else!
March 5, 2011
I was struck by the serious, no-nonsense expressions on these representatives of a vacation home rental service, and the following thoughts came to mind: 1. “We had so much fun working together as CIA interrogators, it seemed only natural to start a business together in the hospitality industry!” 2. Survey from a Satisfied Customer: “The […]
How to Meet Men
March 4, 2011
Hey ladies, having trouble meeting men? Did you know if you borrow money and refuse to repay it, men will come right to your door?
The Case of Klipspringer’s Shoes–Part 3 of 3
March 3, 2011
What if Fitzgerald had written a total of 10 chapters instead of 9? What if he’d originally shown his editor an alternative chapter 6 with more scenes of Gatsby and Daisy as a couple, but set to a groan-inducing sub-plot–like a visit from Nick’s adorable tow-headed cousin Lil’ Oliver, and you would not believe the […]
What I’m Thinking About While You’re Talking
February 27, 2011
My wife thinks I take too long picking a shirt in the morning…but in the movies, when someone dies, his ghost is stuck wearing those same clothes for eternity.
I’ll Never Sell Out!
February 26, 2011
When I was a kid I swore I would never sell out… …but nobody ever asked me to. Not even once. Now I would give anything to have that chance. If you hear of any sell-out opportunities, let me know.
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