Whenever we attend a family get-together and somebody says they have good news to share, my wife and I shout out, “We’re getting a divorce!”
The rest of the evening is spent trying to talk us out of it and always ends with us agreeing to maybe give it one more chance. On the way out I turn and say, “Oh, I’m sorry. Did somebody have some good news to share?”
Nobody ever does.
Of course my wife and I will reconcile in a week or two…or maybe even sooner if we hear somebody else has good news.
Posted in: Short-Sleeve Stories
The Good Greatsby 
ageehumfly
March 3, 2011
Nice! Maybe we could play a Good News, Bad News game. “The good news is that I found a job! The bad news is…”
Tooty Nolan
March 4, 2011
Oh, that’s mean.
Speeder
March 4, 2011
I tried half of this idea. I yelled “We’re getting a divorce” as I entered a room filled with friends. Through an oversight I did not mention the plan to my wife in advance. My experience was different than yours.
The Good Greatsby
March 6, 2011
I hesitate to give relationship advice, but a healthy marriage should take time for open communication each week where you can discuss important issues like how to keep others from getting attention or how to provide each other alibis in the event of police interrogation and we’re placed in different rooms to try and make us contradict each other’s version of events.
modestypress
March 7, 2011
I tell people that my wife and I (married for 45 years)are 80% incompatible. (This is true, btw.) The good news people then try and find the 20% compatibility. The bad news people then ask why we are married. I tell them: We are too weird for anyone else to put up with so we decided to stick together.
Margie
April 8, 2011
Healthy marriages should also talk about who gets the kids in the event of a divorce. I told my husband that I would make sure that he got all three of our dear children (and the cat). That pretty much guaranteed we’d stay together through the tough years.
The Good Greatsby
April 8, 2011
That’s a great strategy for sticking together!