Dream a Little Dream for Me…Or Else

Posted on March 1, 2013


My 11-year-old recently asked me, “When I was little did you have any dreams for what you wanted me to be when I grew up?” I thought about his question for a moment before answering, “I always dreamed you’d grow up to be the president’s son.”

There are still so many things I want to accomplish in life and I can’t spare any of my dream energy to focus on his dreams, so I don’t see why the two of us can’t share the same mutually beneficial dream. Every night before he goes to bed I tell him one of my dreams for him.

I dream you’ll grow up to be the type of person who can accomplish anything…because of the large inheritance you receive from your parents.

I dream you’ll grow up to be a starting quarterback in college…because the stadium is named after your father.

If you choose to become an actor, I dream you’ll grow up to make it on your own without having to use the Hollywood connections your father made when he crashed Zooey Deschanel’s wedding.

I dream girls will love you for your personality and not just because they expect you to grow even handsomer as you age, just like your dad.

I dream you’ll be invited to all the best parties, because those parties take place at your parents’ lakeside mansion.

I dream you’ll win an Academy Award for starring in a movie about your dad.

I dream you’ll always take good care of your little brother and possibly give him a job, so he doesn’t try moving back in with your parents.

I dream you’ll be able to experience the joys of travel and some day visit all thirty countries where your dad has been slapped by a beautiful woman.

I dream you’ll discover the cure for cancer…in your dad’s high-fives.

Posted in: Family