Arizona: 47 days without a killer bee attack.
Connecticut: ‘Connect’ing Rhode Island and New York since 1788.
Delaware: Experts in giving directions to Maryland, Pennsylvania, or New Jersey.
Kansas: You’ve got to stop for gas somewhere–why not stop in Kansas?
Kentucky: Now accessible by car.
Louisiana: Anyone named Louis or Ana eats free.
Maine: Once part of Massachusetts. How about those Red Sox, Bruins, Celtics, and Patriots?
Maryland: Birthplace of actor David Hasselhoff. Also actor John Wilkes Booth.
Minnesota: Brrrrrrr!
Mississippi: Ruining spelling tests since 1817.
Montana: Not affiliated with Joe Montana.
Nebraska: Do you know where Abraham Lincoln was born? If not, then it was Nebraska.
Nevada: Come to get married, stay to get divorced.
New Jersey: If you’re on your way to New York, would it kill you to stop and say hi? Maybe.
New Mexico: Like Mexico but newer.
New York: Not as new as when we first named it.
North Dakota: A cut above South Dakota.
Ohio: Birthplace of President Warren G. Harding’s mistress. Also Warren G. Harding.
Oregon: Paying more for aluminum cans than any state in the Union.
Rhode Island: Not really an island so you can get here by car.
Texas: If you’ve got some time to kill, why not kill it in the state that executes more criminals than any other?
Utah: Like Nevada without gambling or liquor.
Washington: Similar to Oregon but without the 5 cent can recycling incentive.
West Virginia: Turn left when you get to Virginia.
Wyoming: Come for the sagebrush, stay also for the sagebrush.
The Good Greatsby 
Thomas Stazyk
July 1, 2011
How long did it take you to come up with this?
You forgot Alaska: “For those who can’t afford a trip to Russia”
Surrey gal
July 2, 2011
Ha ha ha, love the Alaska one 😀
She's a Maineiac
July 1, 2011
Ooh, the Hoff! I wanna go to Maryland! And you’ve pretty much summed up Maine, so sad, really. Maine: A nice place to wait as the border patrol sifts through the underwear in your luggage.
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
Maybe Maine should ask Massachusetts to consider reconciliation.
jollof
July 1, 2011
This is an ingenious idea for a post! Louisiana is my favourite. Kudo’s for taking the time to compile this. Definitely worth the read 😀
Lenore Diane
July 1, 2011
Love this! Really … how long did it take for you to think of these? Are you working on Part II? Thomas’ slogan for Alaska is pretty ding dang good.
Nevada – come to get married, stay to get divorced; Kentucky – now accessible by car. (The same could be said for W. VA.) Man, these are great!
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
I plan to do a part 2 sometime soon.
ryoko861
July 1, 2011
*cracking up* those were good!!!!
ryoko861
July 1, 2011
Add for Pennsylvania….don’t stop, just keep going.
elisajoy
July 2, 2011
yes, this is perfect. i call pennsylvania: purgatory.
Hannah Miller
July 1, 2011
Michigan’s real state motto: “Si Quaeris Peninsulam Amoenam Circumspice”, = “If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look around you” = “If you seek an abandoned industrial wasteland and also cherries, look around you”
Brown Road Chronicles
July 2, 2011
I thought the official Michigan slogan was “will the last one out please turn out the lights”, but I like yours better!
Modesty Press
July 1, 2011
I live in Washington. Please refer to us as Mr. Washington state or Ms. Washington state as the case may be, but not as that state next to Oregon or as the other washington. Also, please keep our Vancouver separate from the one next to the city for the “newly wed or nearly dead” which doesn’t process its sewage which iy releases in our direction.
[Waiting for your follow up on slogans for all the Canadian provinces.]
She's a Maineiac
July 1, 2011
I used to live in Olympia when I was in college and got tired of saying to everyone “I went to school in Washington… STATE” because they’d always assume DC. Then they’d scratch their heads and say, “where is that again? Oh! Above Oregon! Okay!”
thelifeofjamie
July 1, 2011
I saw a shirt one time that said Dela-WHERE?
Bearman
July 2, 2011
Under There!!!!
Lorna's Voice
July 1, 2011
Can’t wait for part 2. Where do you come up with these ideas? Do you sleep?
Spectra
July 1, 2011
Love “New Mexico- newer than Mexico”. 😉
and of course New Jersey, would it kill you to stop? Well, maybe…
Jeeniyus!
Piper Bayard
July 1, 2011
What a hoot! I’m from New Mexico, and I can attest to the truth of this slogan. Thanks for the laugh.
lipstickandlegislature
July 1, 2011
Washington, DC: Not enough of a state to be featured on the Good Greatsby.
Bearman
July 2, 2011
…and not a state.
monicastangledweb
July 2, 2011
Arizona, where everyone has a gun.
California, best place to Shake, Rattle AND Roll.
Abby
July 2, 2011
Massachusetts: you can’t get there from here so don’t even bother trying.
pegoleg
July 2, 2011
Illinois: We don’t pronounce the “S”.
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
Ha! Yours is similar to my Illinois for part 2.
Steph...In Motion
July 2, 2011
Wait…there a “New” Mexico?
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
I’ve heard part of New Mexico is considering breaking off and they’ll name that section New New Mexico.
spilledinkguy
July 2, 2011
It must have been a challenge to determine which states would produce the most indifferent slogans. Or… not. Eh.
🙂
japecake
July 2, 2011
You need to put some visuals to these, a la Conan’s version:
EllieAnn
July 2, 2011
Iowa: where our girls consider it an honor to be win the state-wide beauty competition and be named, “Pork Queen.”
cooper
July 2, 2011
Alabama: one full set of teeth in every town.
Thomas Stazyk
July 2, 2011
🙂
Laura
July 2, 2011
These are great, but … have I done something to offend you? You left out every state in which I’ve ever lived.
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
I’m planning a part two. I wasn’t sure readers would have the attention span to read fifty in one sitting.
Amy
July 2, 2011
Georgia – All stereotypes welcome!
xeriouslywtf
July 2, 2011
I feel like I’m missing out here in Australia. In my state our slogan is “Victoria – the place to be”, previously “Victoria – on the move” . Comedian Arj Baker joke about how we couldn’t seem to make up our mind i.e. to stay or to go. Great post.
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
If I could afford to live in Victoria I would definitely stay.
Renee Davies
July 2, 2011
Where’s the “No Can Do” state?
The Good Greatsby
July 2, 2011
I can think of about ten states that fit that description.
judithhb
July 2, 2011
Oh I wish I lived in one of those States and thanks to Japecake for the Conan clip. Love it.
Anonymous Betty
July 2, 2011
And now for the cheesiest pickup line involving a state: “Are you from Tennessee? ‘Cuz you’re the only Ten I See.”
georgettesullins
July 2, 2011
Can’t wait for Part II. Every one of these is sooo funny. Can I play too?
Texas “Come text us. Wide open spaces where calls may drop.”
Oklahoma, just north of us..”Not great, not bad, OK. See ya.”
flippingchannels
July 4, 2011
Michigan- At least we’ve still got Detroit.
Lunar Euphoria
July 7, 2011
Ooh! Do Tennessee and Arkansas!