Sometimes I watch my sons while they play outside, and I’m always interested in the new games they invent. This morning I watched my 7-year-old son, The Fonz, spend almost two hours racing against a rock. He would count down 3, 2, 1, then flick a rock across the pavement and sprint to overtake it. He said he was getting faster and faster and by the end of the day he expected to beat the rock every time and would then be “as fast as thunder.” People normally say as fast as lighting, but the speed of sound isn’t too shabby either, and I think The Fonz deserves some credit for setting the slightly more realistic goal of running at the speed of sound rather than the speed of light.
Faster than they look.
The Fonz did occasionally beat the rock, especially because the rock had a tendency to start fast but then taper off and stop towards the end. The Fonz played a similar game last summer when he tried to improve his speed by playing catch with himself. At first I was impressed that he didn’t give up after five minutes but kept trying to play catch with himself for hours. Then I became worried. Then I chose to be impressed again.
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My 9-year-old son told a joke at dinner, everybody laughed, and he added, “Anybody would think that joke was funny, except maybe a guy whose dad had just died.” Everybody laughed again but a few minutes later I began to worry. Kind of seemed like a veiled threat.
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The actor Peter Falk–best known as television detective Columbo–died this week. When I heard the news of his death I couldn’t help but remember the time an actor friend told me he wanted me to guess an impression he had been working on and proceeded to perform a two-minute monologue from Columbo. If I had ever seen Columbo I might have said Peter Falk, but I guessed Tom Hanks, and he was devastated. We rarely hung out after that.
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I’ve heard people say, “It’s always in the last place you look.” You know why you always find things in the last place you looked? Because if you kept looking for something after you’d already found it, you’d be a bit of an idiot.
The Good Greatsby 
azzahawk
June 26, 2011
Oh, I do like these sunday posts…………..
She's a Maineiac
June 26, 2011
I’ll have to tell my son about the Fonz and his rock race. Usually the second we step outside he whines, “But mom, there’s nothing to do out here!” and he want to go play Mario again.
The Good Greatsby
June 26, 2011
The rock race can also be played inside, but I wouldn’t recommend it.
Annie
June 26, 2011
I always love the sunday souffle.
Laura
June 26, 2011
My cat’s name is Thunder; maybe The Fonz just wants to be as fast as him. Although in that case, the rock throwing is kind of disturbing.
The Good Greatsby
June 26, 2011
He likes animals so I wouldn’t expect him to throw a rock at a cat. He might throw a rock at a car though. If your car is nicknamed Thunder, then you should worry.
Bearman
June 26, 2011
Throw the rocks at the fonz and see if he can out run them.
The Good Greatsby
June 26, 2011
I did try throwing the rock for him so he could concentrate on running, but he kept saying I was doing it wrong whenever he lost.
Byron MacLymont
June 26, 2011
Columbo was one of the very best 70’s detective shows, in large part because of Falk’s Walter Matthau-esque sort of anti-handsomeness and schlubby charm. Just a great show, and one of the actors where you immediately think, “If we met, we’d totally be friends.”
Also, I would support Racing Rocks as a new Olympic event.
The Good Greatsby
June 26, 2011
Racing Rocks could catch on pretty easily because it doesn’t require any fancy or expensive equipment. Rocks are free.
Byron MacLymont
June 26, 2011
I suppose that could make athlete endorsements tough. “Hi, I’m decathlete Ashton Eaton. When I need a rock to race, I only use Newberry Crater obsidian…”
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
Are you still using the Newberry Crater obsidian? All the best players have switched to igneous gabbro.
Anonymous Betty
June 26, 2011
Sounds like your sons are very entertaining!
The Good Greatsby
June 26, 2011
I demand to be entertained in exchange for their food and board.
sianblohm
June 26, 2011
I prefer carpet bowls, it keeps me fit, and there is a something called a kitty
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
I’ve never carpet bowled, but I am a fan of both carpet and bowling and I see no reason they wouldn’t work well together.
Brown Road Chronicles
June 27, 2011
I used to play whole 5 on 5 basketball games by myself. It was pretty impressive, but the rock racing takes that to a whole new level.
Regarding the “lost” items, the other thing people say is “retrace your steps”. I’m like, seriously dude, I lost it a week ago, I can’t remember that far back!
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
I can’t spend an entire week walking backwards while retracing my steps. I don’t have the time or agility.
Carl D'Agostino
June 27, 2011
Re inventing childhood games. Miami was full of fruit trees. Did you know that fruit makes the most delightful ammunition when playing war. There’s nothing in life comparable to the splat of a large rotten mango in the face that sends an enemy soldier running home crying. Florida cherries stain clothes and the enemy soldier would get the crap beaten out of him by his mother. Whatta rush. You could knock a kid over with a weighty grapefruit. Ah, war. Childhood. Victory.
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
I’ve thrown a few cherries in my day and can confirm the clothing stains, but we weren’t lucky enough to have mangoes and grapefruit to add variety to our ammunition.
Spectra
June 27, 2011
Love this Souflee’. What a geat cook you are on Sundays. Impressed with sons ability to outrun a rock- I am also relieved he didn’t try to outrun a stationary rock. He’d win every time, and wouldn’t really have improved any skills, except maybe the art of self-delusionment.
As for Peter Falk, I met him in at a British Pub, in Salinas, California, 1991. He was actually handsomer in person. And tan. And having a drink with a burly-looking rock.
Girly
June 27, 2011
I’m jealous – I love Peter Falk.
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
I had no idea Peter Falk was supposed to be handsome either on TV or in person.
Girly
June 27, 2011
I used to play a similar game… I’d flush the toilet and then try to run back to the couch before the toilet went ‘kerfluffrgglerlerfufflrug”. Yeah, I’m not as smart as the Fonz.
I can’t believe you never watched the Columbo?? I’ve seen every episode. I never missed a moment… which is probably what inspired my toilet race game.
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
The toilet race game sounds like a lot of fun, especially with the addition of Columbo.
Kim
June 27, 2011
I discourage running… I don’t want them to be able to get away when I need to whoop some ass
The Good Greatsby
June 27, 2011
I tried racing the rock with him and I was surprised at how fast he was getting. He’ll be difficult to catch when I want to give him a wedgie.
flippingchannels
June 27, 2011
I think next time he wants to play catch with himself you suggest he do it on a hill. That way the ball will turn around and come back to him. Or perhaps you could invest in a boomerang. Be careful though, they’re actually weapons disguised as toys.
Penny
June 27, 2011
The Fonz really has it together! He knows what the wants to succeed in -RACING_ and he has invented his own game ! WOW- you know that says lots about his character and who he will be one day! Maybe a chief “Rock Thrower” or an “Olympic Champion”
Matthew D. Ruiz, Ph.D.
June 27, 2011
I might have to suggest the rock racing to our four year old.
He also loves to make up games, but his explanation of the rules usually last longer than the game itself.
Lenore Diane
June 27, 2011
Have you seen Deb’s (The Monster in your Closet) video of Lil’D playing with his rock? Priceless. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srf-r1dtNjo&feature=player_embedded
Renee Davies
June 28, 2011
Smart kids who make up their own games with “rocks” and who make their parents laugh intentionally! Sunday Souffle is a very attractive title. I wish I could have some now. Chocolate maybe.
gmom
June 28, 2011
Little dude Fonz has the right idea. He may have a future in throwing rocks and running. All the great ones started that way. Ask my usual suspects, hardly ever caught!
writerwoman61
July 5, 2011
I want to hear your son’s joke…
Wendy
Lunar Euphoria
July 6, 2011
The games children invent are full of magic, no?
Love this post.