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Paul Johnson's comedy blog: I didn't get into comedy to be rich or famous. All I've ever wanted was to be loved…by somebody rich and famous.
Browsing All Posts published on »March, 2011«
How to Tease Your Kids
My wife said I can’t tease the kids anymore. I use the word anymore as though it used to be okay to tease and now it isn’t, but in reality she’s always said not to, only now I think she really means it. It seems the kids were having trouble in school for a long […]
BREAKING NEWS!!!: Charlie Sheen, Mark Cuban talk about ‘things’
March 7, 2011
Mark Cuban, owner of the NBA’s Dallas Mavericks, is in talks with Charlie Sheen on a potential new show for his network HDNet. Mark Cuban gave no hints as to the show’s premise, but might Cuban be giving us a clue through his riveting use of the word ‘things’?
Big government versus limited government
March 6, 2011
I’ve heard some very persuasive arguments against big government. But I’ve also heard great counter-arguments touting the government’s ability to regulate more efficiently and with more transparency than private enterprise. But can’t all political parties come together to find common ground and agree that some branch of government must get involved and stop Vin Diesel […]
You will have fun on your vacation…or else!
March 5, 2011
I was struck by the serious, no-nonsense expressions on these representatives of a vacation home rental service, and the following thoughts came to mind: 1. “We had so much fun working together as CIA interrogators, it seemed only natural to start a business together in the hospitality industry!” 2. Survey from a Satisfied Customer: “The […]
How to Meet Men
March 4, 2011
Hey ladies, having trouble meeting men? Did you know if you borrow money and refuse to repay it, men will come right to your door?
The Case of Klipspringer’s Shoes–Part 3 of 3
March 3, 2011
What if Fitzgerald had written a total of 10 chapters instead of 9? What if he’d originally shown his editor an alternative chapter 6 with more scenes of Gatsby and Daisy as a couple, but set to a groan-inducing sub-plot–like a visit from Nick’s adorable tow-headed cousin Lil’ Oliver, and you would not believe the […]
The Case of Klipspringer’s Shoes–Part 2 of 3
March 2, 2011
When I’m reading an all-time great like Gatsby for the second or third time, I begin to imagine what the first draft of the story looked like when the author submitted it to his editor for review. What if the author purposely inserted an undeniably awful sub-plot or chapter to gauge if the editor had […]
The Case of Klipspringer’s Shoes–Part 1 of 3
March 1, 2011
The Comedy Rule of Three is a structure for setting up a punchline: you give two straight lines to establish your meaning is going in one direction, and then the third line is a joke or ironic twist going in another. There’s a musicality and rhythm in listing three that always works better than two […]
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