I spent many years studying foreign languages and one of the biggest challenges was making sense of another language’s proverbs, sayings, and idioms. This led me to research the origins of some of English’s most common sayings, and I was surprised to learn many of the versions we know today have undergone several revisions since the first drafts, some of which I’ve included below.
If you can’t take the heat, open a window.
A fool and his money are easily invited to my party.
Lukes can be deceiving.
Good things come to those who wail.
When one door closes, another always opens. Because of ghosts.
Better to have loved and lost than to have also died of tuberculosis.
Home is where the hearth is.
Absinthe makes the heart beat faster.
Give credit where credit is don’t.
A man is known by the company he keeps. Also his last name.
Kill two birds with ten stones.
It’s raining a lot.
Of course this isn’t a comprehensive list, and if you’re familiar with other first drafts of popular sayings, I’d love to read them in the comments section.
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Since you’ve already spent most of the morning researching your Halloween costume on company time, why not top it off by submitting a caption in the Halloween caption contest?
The Good Greatsby 
dianasschwenk
October 19, 2012
If you love someone, set them free, if they come back they’re yours, if they don’t, hunt them down and kill them…
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
Are you sure that’s not the current version of the saying? That’s how I remember it.
yumnatarian
October 22, 2012
If you love someone, set them free, unless they’re a tiger.
dianasschwenk
October 23, 2012
😉
mimijk
October 19, 2012
A bird in the hand, is cruel.
A penny saved is really worth very little.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
So true; birds were meant to fly.
mimijk
October 19, 2012
exactly!
Hippie Cahier
October 19, 2012
A penny saved isn’t much of a nest egg.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
It always surprises me when people start bragging about earning and saving a penny. You can just as easily find pennies on the ground or in a mall fountain.
Michelle Gillies
October 20, 2012
Unless you are Canadian as they have stopped making them so people are now hoarding the pennies.
She's a Maineiac
October 19, 2012
People who live in glass houses should buy lots of Windex.
Old habits die hard, and usually lead to divorce.
A rolling stone gathers many wrinkles and is way too old to perform in concerts and really should just retire already, sheesh.
A friend in need is a friend I don’t need unless they can pay me back later on.
Don’t cry over spilt milk, cry over spilt vodka.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
I’m sure I’ve used all five of those sayings within the last week.
becomingcliche
October 20, 2012
Rolling stone. YES.
qwinkly3
October 20, 2012
People who live in glass houses should only go potty very late at night.
Read Stuff With Me!
October 19, 2012
All that glitters is not gold. It definitely is something expensive.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
Sometimes all that glitters is literally glitter you can buy at a crafts store.
qwinkly3
October 20, 2012
Yes, but it’s expensive.
Life With The Top Down
October 19, 2012
He won’t buy the cow if he can get the milk just about anywhere these days.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
And who has space for a cow anymore?
Life With The Top Down
October 19, 2012
Seriously! A glass of milk here and there can be very satisfying.
S. Trevor Swenson
October 19, 2012
Real Women Have Curves And Vaginas
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
I’m sure science will eventually find a way to disprove that one.
Michael
October 19, 2012
If at first you don’t succeed, you should probably not try skydiving. Or chainsaw juggling. Or anything involving explosive devices or liquid nitrogen.
Never count your chickens; knight them.
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
Although I typically like my chances of succeeding, you’ve convinced me to wait on skydiving.
qwinkly3
October 20, 2012
Don’t knight your chickens until they’re hatched. Some could be princesses instead.
joehoover
October 19, 2012
A watched pot will stop you burning the custard
qwinkly3
October 20, 2012
A watched pot is a more easily washed pot.
joehoover
October 19, 2012
Accidents will happen, especially if it wasn’t an accident and I pushed you down the stairs on purpose
joehoover
October 19, 2012
An Englishmans home, could probably do with some form of central heating which hasn’t been invented yet
The Good Greatsby
October 19, 2012
I think that ancient saying is the reason we ended up calling it ‘central heating’.
joehoover
October 19, 2012
Don’t count your chickens if they are ducks
Soma Mukherjee
October 19, 2012
# As you shall make your bed so shall you mess it up
# forget Karma luck is everything, how else can you explain the success of those you don’t like?
# Happy the bride who gets expensive presents
# live each day as if it is your last,stop doing laundry
Curmudgeon-at-Large
October 19, 2012
A rolling stone gathers no satisfaction.
Audrey
October 19, 2012
Late to bed, early to rise, makes a man grumpy in the morning.
Audrey
October 19, 2012
No work and all play makes Jack a frat boy!
aparnauteur
October 20, 2012
Grass is always cheaper the other side
random8042
October 20, 2012
Red sky at night, shepherd’s pie.
jonfreer
October 20, 2012
You really hit the kitten on the head.
Lorna's Voice
October 20, 2012
You can’t teach an old dog new math.
Don’t bite the hand that looks dirty.
The pen is mightier than the pigs.
No news is impossible.
swlikeablegirl
October 20, 2012
People who live in glass houses should probably wear pants. Especially if it’s cold.
All the glitters will leave you bitching about glitter getting everywhere.
Keep on keeping on just makes you a gloaty finder. And attracts more losers-weepers, which will make you say jeepers-creepers! Because seriously, who wants to listen to all that crying?
Gow
October 20, 2012
Hell hath no fury like a woman. (What? Was there more to that saying at one point?)
Man does not live by bread alone. They always want sandwiches. (What is it with men and sandwiches?)
Don’t cut your nose off to spite . . . . well, ever. Just don’t do that, K?
Grandpa's Porch
October 20, 2012
actually Gow, I believe that was ”
Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned…”
aparnauteur
October 20, 2012
A house divided against itself equals to 1.
k8edid
October 20, 2012
If you lie down with dogs you will have those weird puppy dog dreams.
k8edid
October 20, 2012
Once burned, twice covered with icky oozing blisters.
zannyro
October 20, 2012
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him bring his own cup.
bluebee
October 20, 2012
You can’t have your cake and be thin
Bill Hayes
October 20, 2012
Better to have loved a short man, than never to have loved a tall.
A secret is something you tell everyone individually.
gluttany is putting the a le carte before the horse.
clemarchives
October 20, 2012
Give a man fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man some wine with that fish and, dude, that’s a really good dinner.
Merideth Grue
October 20, 2012
Why is it that the only companies that give credit where it’s due seems to be credit card companies?
cooper
October 21, 2012
Two’s company, three’s a crowd-pleaser.
Elyse
October 21, 2012
The early bird gets the worm, but the late blogger finds all the good quotes gone.
k8edid
October 21, 2012
She who laughs last laughs at the rest of us.
Elyse
October 21, 2012
Phew. I thought I had blown it. 😉
k8edid
October 21, 2012
Aw, no…better late than not funny at all.
Elyse
October 21, 2012
I’m often late, but I make a big entrance.
Laura
October 22, 2012
Last laughs last longest.
S. Trevor Swenson
October 21, 2012
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, wow, you’re good”
Hansi
October 21, 2012
Early to bed, early to rise. Makes a man healthy wealthy and well rested.
Spectra
October 22, 2012
If at first you don’t succeed, hire a good lawyer, file bankruptcy, then go ahead and borrow some more money and TRY AGAIN!
S. Trevor Swenson
October 22, 2012
Patience is a virtue, but it still sucks to wait.
Bill Hayes
October 22, 2012
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give him the internet and he won’t bother you for months.
k8edid
October 22, 2012
A fool and his money are soon divorced.
Fools rush in where happy hour is going on.
The way to a man’s heart is slightly south of his stomach.
If wishes were horses there’d be a lot of horse poop around here.
S. Trevor Swenson
October 22, 2012
All work and no play makes Jack hate his boss and drink too much.
k8edid
October 22, 2012
Amen.
Binky
October 22, 2012
Give me liberty, or give me chocolate.
Laura
October 22, 2012
Give me chocolate, or else.
spilledinkguy
October 23, 2012
Ghosts are ridiculously energy-inefficient.
thoughtsappear
October 23, 2012
It would take me more like 20 stones to kill 2 birds.
artjen1971
October 23, 2012
Our friend Comic Book Store Guy says, “Eh…one half does the other.” (just incase it’s lost in translation–he means: six in one hand, half a dozen in the other. But now, in our house it simply means “one half does the other…”)
Brother Jon
October 23, 2012
Reblogged this on Brother Jon and commented:
Not only is this a funny post, it also has a link at the end directing you towards a caption contest. A caption contest that I happen to be a finalist in. Check it out, and maybe vote….please.
Love and Lunchmeat
October 23, 2012
There are other mermaids in the sea.
It’s raining water and more water.
A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.
A journey of a thousand miles takes a very long time.
This feels underwhelming. It’s better when you do it. And I’m not just saying that because I’m lazy… although that may be a factor.
becca3416
October 23, 2012
I knew I wasn’t just having an adverse reaction to Absinthe!
earthriderjudyberman
October 25, 2012
A rolling stone gathers no boss.
The Good Greatsby
October 25, 2012
That makes sense.
dearrosie
October 30, 2012
Hah hah your list and all the comments have been very entertaining. Thanks I’ve enjoyed my visit. Do you know where an expression like this one
“When one door closes, another always opens. Because of ghosts.”
– originated? Why ghosts?
HoaiPhai
October 31, 2012
1. A penny saved is a penny spurned.
2. Dave Barry’s “I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet, so I stole his shoes”.
3. “Whoever said ‘a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush’ has obviously had his bird in the wrong bushes.” unknown