My friend Andrew took this picture:
At first he laughed at the sign because who needs to be warned, “NO SMIWWING”? I think we’re all born with the intrinsic knowledge that smiwwing is not acceptable. But the more he thought about the wanring, the more he felt compelled by the rebellious, overpowering urge to smiw.
Optimist Prime took this picture in front of a restaurant and brought it back to me in the hopes I could explain the operational hours.
We’ve been dying to try this restaurant, but we’re just not sure if it’s ever open. If we had to pick a day to visit, it would probably be on Fryday, although I’m trying not to eat fried foods.
…..
Congratulations to Amy of fixitordeal.wordpress.com for winning the caption contest. Why not spend your Sunday submitting a caption in the new caption contest?
The Good Greatsby 
ajg
August 28, 2011
That hours schedule is hilarious! Where is it??
The Good Greatsby
August 28, 2011
The picture is defintely funnier when you can see it. It should be working now.
k8edid
August 28, 2011
My kids would be all “But, Wowwy, me mant to go Smiwwing”. These crack me up.
The Good Greatsby
August 28, 2011
The more I say smiwwing, the more I welcome it as an alternative to swimming.
Invisible Mikey
August 28, 2011
Dyslexics UNTIE!
k8edid
August 28, 2011
Ho my Dog.
The Good Greatsby
August 28, 2011
OLO!
georgettesullins
August 28, 2011
Is there a swoking jacket cowing?
She's a Maineiac
August 28, 2011
It’s Fryday every day at our house! Yuwwy-www www!
Lorna's Voice
August 28, 2011
I love road and warming sings. Great pics!
gerknoop
August 28, 2011
Come ON, hasn’t anyone heard of “smiwwing”? It’s an ancient Chinese tree rustling game type thingy…it has NOTHING what so EVER to do with what you all are thinking….GEEZE! Get a clue people! All my Chinese friends play this game! Sometimes these signs are posted in areas where the trees are poisonous. Your welcome for the clearing up of that! 🙂
thelifeofjamie
August 28, 2011
I would be hesitant to go to a restaurant on Fryday…who knows what goes into the deep fryer.
Lenore Diane
August 28, 2011
I quite enjoy being ‘edumacated’ by your Chinglish lessons.
No smiwwing? I can hear the children mhiwpering mith disappointwent.
Amy
August 28, 2011
Just spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out how one would even pronounce “smiwwing.” And does no one else see F@#K in the Chinese characters? Just me?
And I can’t believe I finally won that freakin’ caption contest. Thank you to anyone and everyone who voted for me and thanks to my mom who I am sure was responsible for about half the votes.
John Erickson
August 28, 2011
Maybe the sign printer ran the sign through upside down? Or – here’s the REALLY clever bit – the printer took into account refraction of the image, so it only says “No Swimming: if you’re under water! (Yah – I know – WEAK!)
And I do believe I wrote a BASIC program once that could calculate when the restaurant would be open. I can send you a free copy – you just need an Apple 2 on which to run it. Yes, I could loan you that, too. (You’ve heard of lading-edge technology? I fell off the back of the knife, somewhere between the Apple and the 8-track recorder.)
Spectra
August 28, 2011
With all of the newfound wealth in China these days, it is a wonder someone doesn’t think to say, “Hey! Let’s invest in a translator for our public signage!”
That memo may indeed have gone out, but translated like this: “Yeh! Lest invert transit for our pub licking singers!”
Somewhere in China tonight, a Pub-licking Singer is performing to a packed house who arrived by taking the backwards train.
Laura
August 29, 2011
The other great thing about the “no smiwwing” sign is that, the way the picture is framed, it doesn’t appear to be anywhere near a body of water.
PCC Advantage
August 29, 2011
Well that sucks! Do you think that they’d make any concessions for competitive smiwwers? I guess not, huh? Maybe only on Frydays…
Deborah the Closet Monster
August 29, 2011
I don’t mean to imply Japan and China are interchangeable by typing this, but I did experience a few places in Japan where the closing time was, roughly, “whenever we damn well feel like closing.” (Alternatively, “whenever we run out of the beer you keep coming here to buy” is a possibility.) I wonder if that’s what the sign says? Giving a rough number might make the experience a little less head-explodey for those trying to figure out if it’s worth coming at 10 p.m., or whether “when we feel like it” is closer to 7 p.m.
BTW, much as it might clash with others’ principles? I totally smiw at noon every other Thursday.
spilledinkguy
August 29, 2011
So exclusive it’s only open one hour… some… secret day of the week.
Jess Witkins
August 29, 2011
Sounds like a warning from the priest in A Princess Bride: Smiwwing is what bwings us togetha today.
Jen
August 29, 2011
Mmmm, fryday… my favorite day of the week!
amblerangel
August 29, 2011
It actually means no swimming upside down.
Laura
August 29, 2011
“It’s Fryday, Fryday, gotta eat fries on Fryday” — seriously, I’ve been hearing this in a loop in my head all day. Please, please make it stop.
pegoleg
August 29, 2011
They’re open at 11. Just figure out if that is am or pm.
Todd Pack
August 29, 2011
When smiwwing is outlawed, only outlaws will smiw.
pattisj
August 30, 2011
Fryday, darn I missed it.
HoaiPhai
August 30, 2011
Didn’t a pope declare the day between Thursday and Saturday “Fryday” to remind people they have to eat only fish and chips on that holiest of days?