Alex Trebek, host of US television’s game show Jeopardy, injured his Achilles tendon when he chased after a burglar in a San Francisco hotel. He awoke to find a woman in his room who was going through his possessions and he chased after her, only to collapse in the hallway. When I read the news, I often interpret stories through their potential for comedy, and I’m relieved Trebek wasn’t seriously injured so it wouldn’t be tasteless for me to think of some headlines to describe the story.
Police Demand Answers; Alex Trebek Demands Questions
Alex Trebek Chases Burglar; Achilles Tendon in Jeopardy
Alex Trebek Identifies Burglar; Police Insist He Give Identity in the Form of a Question
Injured Game Show Hosts for $1,000
Answer: Alex Trebek; Question: Who Ruptured His Achilles Tendon While Chasing a Burglar?
Alex Trebek Burglar Apprehended; Her Freedom Now in Jeopardy
Burglar Confused as Trebek Demands to be Robbed in the Form of a Question
Trebek Yells ‘Stop Thief’; Thief Yells Back ‘What are Things Alex Trebek Yells at a Burglar?’
Trebek Wins Arrest of Thief After Wagering on Her Correct Description
Police to Trebek Burglary Suspect: You Have the Right to Remain Silent; Burglar Replies: What are My Miranda Rights?
Trebek Wagers He Can Outrun Burglar; He is Incorrect
The Good Greatsby 
Kim Pugliano
July 28, 2011
My favorite: Trebek Yells ‘Stop Thief’; Thief Yells Back ‘What are Things Alex Trebek Yells at a Burglar?’
Awesome.
gojulesgo
July 29, 2011
I was just going to say the same!
pegoleg
July 28, 2011
I’m just glad he wasn’t in Double Jeopardy.
The Good Greatsby
July 29, 2011
Would that have been the case if he had ruptured both Achilles tendons?
thelifeofjamie
July 28, 2011
Answer: A bafoon
question: What Alex Trebek looks like during his news conference to announce that he was injured while “trying” to stop a burglar with his witty banter and canadian accent?
monicastangledweb
July 28, 2011
Poor Trebek and poor you for having to come up with all these goofy headlines. Way to go!
educlaytion
July 28, 2011
Pat Sajak has been waiting for this moment for years. In fact, the burglar might’ve been Sajak in drag. Or Vanna White. Better put the Jeopardy Clue Crew on this case.
The Good Greatsby
July 29, 2011
Trebek will have his revenge and then I’ll get a chance to write about Sajak buying a vowel.
Tori Nelson
July 28, 2011
Alex Trebek
Who is the new Chuck Norris?
Lorna's Voice
July 28, 2011
I wonder if he heard the “Double Jeopardy” music playing in the background as he took chase? Funny headlines. I liked the first one best!
madtante
July 29, 2011
What Ancient Greek was known for the back of his ankle being his only weakness?
Trick question as Trebek and Achilles are both Ancient Greeks! See what I did there? I know it’s incredibly lame if I’m having to explain the hilarity… Such is my sense of humor, I’m afraid.
Posky
July 29, 2011
She must be the one who also stole his mustache.
The Good Greatsby
July 29, 2011
I’ve been wondering where that mustache went.
Byron MacLymont
July 29, 2011
Always a tense moment – reading a news item, it’s really funny… will it turn out someone was seriously injured? Had their life ruined? No? Ka-ching! Comedy gold!
The Good Greatsby
July 29, 2011
Exactly right. Anything worse than an Achilles tendon would have nixed any potential for comedy.
cooper
July 29, 2011
sure it wasn’t art fleming in drag??? maybe don pardo….
Lenore Diane
July 29, 2011
I agree with Kim (the G is silent) on all counts.
ryoko861
July 29, 2011
You had a good time with this didn’t you?
I can tell.
Graham Strong
July 29, 2011
Question: What is Alex Trebek’s Achille’s heel? Answer: His Achille’s heel.
Amy
July 29, 2011
Burglar: I’ll take “Things That Aren’t Mine” for $100, Alex.
flippingchannels
July 30, 2011
Ha! Nice one.
HoaiPhai
July 29, 2011
I heard that Watson, the IBM computer, put her up to it.
Paige Kellerman
July 29, 2011
I respect Alex Trebek almost as much as my own father, so this story was really upsetting. Didn’t this thief know that Trebek could’ve hurt himself badly enough to cancel Jeopardy?..or worse, make them show re-runs?
Category: People who Make Me Angry
Answer: Stupid Thief
Question: Who the hell do you think you are?
Beach Bum
July 29, 2011
Alex Trebek, maybe the one man left on television with an IQ over 50. I would say he is a American national treasure but he is Canadian and I would not want to insult him especially since we have fine examples like Snooki, Sarah Palin, and the entire crew at Fox News proving American Exceptionalism.
The Good Greatsby
July 29, 2011
It’s always disappointing to learn so much of our national treasure belongs to someone else.
gmom
July 29, 2011
Uncle. Uncle.
You win Greatsby.
We’re not worthy. We’re not worthy.
Binky
July 29, 2011
Does Trebek’s injury jeopardize Jeopardy?
subWOW
July 29, 2011
I am so happy that Trebek was not seriously injured. Otherwise if you still posted this, I would have to comment with a pseudo pseudo name so I wouldn’t have been ashamed of finding this hilarious.
Lunar Euphoria
July 29, 2011
Great, now I’ll have the Jeopardy theme song looping through my head the rest of the day…
pearlsandprose
July 29, 2011
Love the second one (and the title!).
Tar-Buns
July 31, 2011
Funny, only because Mr. Jeopardy was not harmed. Love that show and Alex.
Where DID that mustache go???